A Never Ending Plight - 2020 Black Tears
Exhaustion During the Resistance
Over the past week I have found myself to be exhausted. I’ve had insomnia. I’ve had moments where I’ve wanted to curl into the tiniest of ball and disappear. I’ve become excessive in keeping up to date with what’s going on in our world during these troubling times. COVID-19 and the consistent terror against black bodies throughout the United States of America feels never ending. I’ve had moments where I just burst into tears or hold my head in my hands and close my eyes very tight. I can feel the stress in my temples. A deep hurt in my heart from the pain of seeing black women, men, and children fighting, screaming, demanding justice BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY! Our POC and white allies marching aside us and getting retaliated against pains me. Seeing that baby girl screaming violently after being pepper sprayed by police in Seattle, milk being thrown over her face to stop the pain, hurts me.
I can’t unsee George Floyd’s death. I can’t unsee the police tear gassing and beating peaceful protesters with their shields and batons. I can’t unsee Trump, with his bitch ass, being a horrible leader of our “free” nation. Trump using extreme force on our own citizens. The media being detained.
I feel so much anger of the whitesplaining. So much anger from racists comments about black people, about us, about me! So much anger from friends and family who support force used against black bodies, who care more about looting of businesses than human bodies. Those who have the privilege of not being affected by anything that is happening. Frustrated of those who are going on as business as usual. Mad as hell at those who twist historical figures and narratives to make them feel safe and confident in their USA.
Coping with Trauma and Injustice
To cope, I decided to pick up the brush. As Nina Simone once said, “An Artist’s duty, as far as I’m concerned, is to reflect the times. I think that is true of painters, sculptures, poets, musicians. As far as I’m concerned, it’s their choice, but I CHOOSE to reflect the times and situations in which I find myself. That, to me, is my duty. And at this crucial time in our lives, when everything is so desperate, when everyday is a matter of survival, I don’t think you can help but be involved. Young people, black and white, know this…So I don’t think you have a choice. How can you be an artist and NOT reflect the times? That to me is the definition of an artist.”
The first piece in this series of work is called “2020 Black Tears”. I wanted to explore unfamiliar mediums during this time of unrest. Gouache, acrylic paint pens, and ultra matte medium. I hearkened back to one of the first creative works I explored as an adolescent, wood carving. I was inspired by some of the artwork from the Black Panther Party and old black political artwork. Instead of getting wood and bringing my carving tools out, I did some color blocking on heavy watercolor paper and worked away at the piece with acrylic pens of various sizes.
This piece speaks to the constant pain I’ve felt this week. Just trying my best to maintain, be the proud black woman that I am, and support my people through this crisis and injustice. I hope you enjoy this new series of work. Power to the people. - Sade
2020 BLACK TEARS
Gouache, Acrylic, & Paint Pen on Watercolor Paper